Do you have a bad gut feeling about your relationship? Do you sense that something isn’t right? Take your feelings seriously and look closer.
Violence has many faces – it can happen both offline and online. In fact, both often go hand in hand. In our digital world, control, intimidation, and surveillance via smartphones, apps, or social media are closely linked to other forms of violence and reinforce existing patterns.
Digital violence is emotional violence
Do you feel like your partner controls your phone or computer? Reads your messages or tracks your location? Digital violence in relationships is often underestimated. But if someone monitors, humiliates, controls, or threatens you online, it is not just happening digitally – it often extends to offline life as well.
Trust does not mean sharing passwords. Trust means respecting your privacy. Your phone, your accounts, and your data belong to you.
Digital violence is real, and it can be overwhelming. It knows no physical boundaries. It instills fear. But there are ways to protect yourself and get help.
You are not alone
Listen to your gut feeling and seek support:
- There are support services for people who are experiencing violence in their relationship in Switzerland. They offer free, confidential and anonymous advice.
- The #withyou questionnaire can help you gain clarity and recognize warning signs of an abusive relationship.
- The Safe withyou online storage helps you securely store evidence in an independent location, so you are better prepared to take legal action if necessary.
Digital hygiene in relationships: Protect yourself online
Digital violence is violence. It should be taken seriously. You have the right to be safe – both online and offline. Just as personal space is important in a healthy relationship, it also matters in the digital world:
- Own passwords, own accounts: Do not share your passwords. Use secure combinations and activate two-factor authentication. What is a secure password? It should be at least 12 characters long, preferably 14 or more, with a mix of uppercase and lowercase letters, numbers, and special characters. Using a password manager can help you avoid having the same password on each platform. It generates a password for each website and saves them inside the app.
- Check location sharing: Disable location services if you don’t want your partner to track you. For tips on how to switch off location sharing on iPhone and Android, please check the FAQs at the bottom of this page. Also, check what you share on social media and whether your current location is visible.
- Be aware of suspicious apps and access: Avoid installing apps you don't recognize and remove any that you didn’t personally install on your device. Before deleting, check online if they are pre-installed system apps, like a clock or calculator.
- Regularly review devices and accounts: Check your phone’s security settings to see if unknown devices or sessions are active. For detailed information on how to remove unwanted connected devices and accounts on Android and iPhone, please have a look at the FAQs at the bottom of this page.
- Browse in private mode or delete your search history regularly: Here are some tips for online safety.
If you have any feedback or would like to share your story, feel free to reach out to us at info@with-you.ch
This guide was created in partnership with the CyberPeace Institute.
