It is not easy to see and understand toxic patterns in a relationship. No relationship is perfect. But there is a difference between occasional arguments and unhealthy or even harmful dynamics.
If you ever wondered whether your relationship is healthy, we got your back. With the support of experts and victims of domestic violence, we have developed a questionnaire to help you find answers.
Before you start: We would like to encourage you to seek help if you experience any form of violence. Even if you are not sure yet or just have an uneasy feeling.
Do you feel anxious or scared about your partner's reaction when you communicate with him/her? (e.g. you feel like you're walking on eggshells)
Does your partner often blame you for problems and criticize you constantly?
Has your partner ever behaved in a way that made you question your own judgement or reality? (e.g. distortion of facts that make you second-guess)
Does your partner have major mood swings? (e.g. from affectionate to cold or aggressive)
Is he/she extremely jealous? (e.g. wrongly accusing you of cheating)
Does your partner insult, humiliate or belittle you? (e.g. name calling, make rude remarks)
Does your partner make you feel like you’re not good or worthy enough?
Does your partner constantly message or call you whenever you are out without him/her?
Do you feel your partner influences what people you meet or what activities you pursue?
Does he/she control your finances? (e.g. decides how money should be spent)
Has your partner ever threatened to harm you, your family, your children, or friends?
Has he/she ever threatened to self-harm, for example when you talk about ending the relationship?
Have you ever been physically assaulted by your partner?
Has your partner ever forced you to have sex or engage in sexual acts that you didn't want to do?
Has your partner ever hurt someone close to you? (e.g. children, friends, family or pets)